Something just crossed my mind: Who do atheists thank for Fridays?

I’m gonna thank God. I need the sleep. I slept terribly Wednesday night, but last night seemed to be going really well until a few minutes to 4 actually, when the woman in my smoke detector started screaming that she needed a new battery. “BEEP! New battery!”. That’s what I was thinking too… “BEEP new batteries!!”

I spent hours in the room last night without a solitary warning. I read. I spoke on the phone. I ate bacon, eggs and toast for dinner ;). No beeps. I fell asleep without incident and apparently stayed that way for hours. All of a sudden, and well into REM, the voice of the “sound sleep detector” tears off it’s clothes and starts streaking (and shrieking maniacally) through the early morning silence. It didn’t seem like it was running out of battery to me – unless of course this was tantamount to the grand finale!!

Perhaps there was such urgency because it detected a fire lurking in shadows peeping around the corner to see if the coast was clear to really get started. Perhaps it was an orange ninja running along rooftops as fires are want to do. But I hope that if ever she really does detect smoke or fire, that she says something other than “BEEP. Low battery”.